


Pilot Showdown

by EvilFuzzy9



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Ambiguous Age, F/F, Hate Sex, Ryona, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-15 01:03:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8036212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvilFuzzy9/pseuds/EvilFuzzy9
Summary: Asuka loathes Rei. Rei is ambivalent to Asuka. Naturally, they have a fight in the NERV locker rooms. [ryona, yuri, hatesmex]]





	Pilot Showdown

Asuka glared at Rei Ayanami and her stupid, perfect, porcelain tits. She hated that damned emotionless mannequin stare, and she hated that stupidly round and bouncy ass, and most of all she utterly abhored those vast, swaying, jiggling mammary mountains. She hated it all so much that it made her wet with rage, that her cunt burned even hotter than her face whenever she caught a flash of those unreasonable breasts.  
  
Not that she was jealous of Rei. What the hell did that bitch have for  _her_  to be jealous of? The very notion was absurd. Asuka had no reason to envy Rei, nothing about that girl to covet for herself. Yet when she tried to explain it to Hikari, the girl had just given her a look, shrugged, and said, "Yeah, that sounds like jealousy to me."  
  
But it wasn't jealousy. She didn't envy Rei's body, because her body was even better. At least if you asked Asuka, the half-German would say that her tits were bigger, softer, perkier, and shapelier than Rei's. She'd tell you that  _her_  rack wasn't some disgusting, obscene protrusion of useless fatty sacks. Rei's breasts were vulgar, unnatural, and needlessly big.  
  
Who'd ever heard of a pureblooded  _nihonjin_  with such massive boobs? Not that Asuka was entirely sure Rei was Japanese, pure or mixed—her hair was BLUE for God's sake! But still, those tits looked to her as if they simply did not belong on Rei's frame. They were gratuitous, absurd, unnecessary hills of flesh whose only conceivable use would be to entertain some stupid pervert.  
  
Whereas Asuka's breasts were perfect, as flawless as the rest of her. Or so she would tell you. Maybe she was a little biased, she could admit, but still you couldn't deny that she was a hundred times sexier than that stupid, mindless sex toy NERV called a pilot. She was  _at least_  as shapely as Rei, only much better, and with an actual personality. Anyone who said Rei was preferable was clearly just some kind of pig only interested in sticking their dick up a cold fish of a bitch who'd just stand there and take it.  
  
That was Asuka's belief. If she hated Rei, it was for personal reasons and not at all out of jealousy, and most especially not to obfuscate any kind of guilty attraction to the girl. Of course. It wasn't as though she LIKED the blue-haired  _schlampe_.That would be absured. Rei might not have been ugly—even Asuka couldn't stretch herself to say this—but she wasn't specially attractive either. What part of that over buxom bimbo was there that Asuka could not find on herself?  
  
If she wanted a female to get off on, she could just look in a mirror. And maybe that was a slightly narcissistic thought, but Asuka didn't care.  
  
She simply glared daggers at Rei as the girl dawdled in the locker room, taking forever to undress her dumb, excessively curvy ass. It did not come into Asuka's mind that she was probably being just as bad, standing there in just her underwear with her plugsuit still hanging inside her locker. She was too busy silently expressing her disdain for Rei to bother with such minor details.  
  
It didn't help that Rei appeared to show no sign of acknowledging Asuka's glare. For all that she reacted, she might not have even noticed. That was another thing Asuka hated about the girl. She was so damn  _self absorbed_. It was galling to try and talk to someone who wouldn't even look at you, who half the time didn't even bother with engaging in the conversation. Like she thought she was better than everyone else.  
  
An amateur psychiatrist might have said Asuka was simply projecting.  
  
Asuka would have punched them right in their stupid face.  
  
"Hey, blow-up doll," the redhead called over to Rei, watching as the bluenette slowly slipped down her panties, baring a deep-cleft beachball of an ass that was not at all breathtaking, arousing, or impressive, not in the slightest. "Are you done yet?"  
  
Rei stepped back and bent down to retrieve her panties, as though completely ignoring Asuka. Despite feeling irked by this, the redhead contented herself with glaring at (and not ogling) the sight of Rei's upthrust backside and smooth, shaven pussy. It was another irritating thing to see the girl's cunt so meticulously free of hair. Asuka felt that was something only a slut obsessed with pleasing men would do.  
  
Asuka Langley-Sohryu, as anyone could tell you, was a woman of varied, vocal, and vehement opinions.  
  
Only after taking what seemed like a glacial age to fold her panties and neatly stack them atop the rest of her clothes did Rei finally show any sign of having heard Asuka. She stepped back from the locker and turned to look over her shoulder at the German, as a result presenting both ass and tits to her fellow pilot's view. Asuka's glare intensified.  
  
"Are you?" Rei asked.  
  
From somebody else, Asuka could and  _would_  have taken this statement as snark and responded accordingly. But she had enough experience with Rei to realize that the girl was borderline autistic in her grasp and use of sarcasm, and practically a robot in human skin as far as emotional response. Rei didn't snark, didn't snipe, didn't quip or retort or  _retaliate_.  
  
This made it all the more infuriating to deal with the bitch.  
  
Asuka felt her face heat up, and she crossed her arms petulantly under her chest.  
  
"Almost," she grumbled. "But what's with you? You're taking forever."  
  
Rei cocked her head and looked intently at Asuka.  
  
"You haven't taken off all your clothes yet," she said, an apparent non-answer.  
  
Asuka glowered, and irritatedly she reached for the clasp of her bra, which she undid. Impatiently she threw her bra in the general direction of her locker. Then she yanked down her panties and roughly kicked them away.  
  
" _There,_ " Asuka snapped. "Now we're both naked. Is that what you wanted?"  
  
Rei did not answer. Not immediately. She looked at Asuka for a long moment, casting eerie red eyes slowly up and down her comrade's nude form. Her expression did not change in the least, but Asuka blushed and shifted to cover herself all the same, made a touch modest by the bland intensity of Rei's stare.  
  
"You have a well-developed figure," Rei said at last.  
  
"Of course I do,  _puppe_ ," Asuka muttered, an arm covering her nipples and a hand placed self-consciously over her privates. "I'm a healthy Deutsche who eats plenty of meat and dairy, not some skinny vegetarian bitch."  
  
"Yes, I suppose a diet high in animal fats might contribute to your impressive reserves," Rei said detachedly. "That does not account for all of it, though. We are, after all, of equal build in that particular regard."  
  
Asuka twitched, and one of her hands curled into a fist.  
  
"Not equal," she said lowly. "Don't try and put yourself on my level."  
  
Rei inclined her head in a strangely alien sort of way, something about her manner making the gesture seem uncanny, robotic, inhuman.  
  
"I don't understand," she replied.  
  
"What's not to understand?"  
  
"Your suggestion that we are unequal," Rei said in her forever bland and neutral tone. "That statement is contrary to empirical reality. Our bust size is identical. Our field performance records are equivalent. Even our academic grades are within the same range."  
  
Something in Asuka snapped at those words.  
  
" _Küss meinen Arsch_ ," she snarled, raising a fist into the air with all thoughts of modesty forgotten. "I won't be dragged down to the level of some unemotional sex doll. I'm BETTER than you, dammit!"  
  
And saying this she advanced quickly, striding toward Rei with a look of fiery menace. Her temper had been roused beyond the point of restraint, and she would revenge her stinging pride on this bitch. She was the best, goddammit. She  _had_ to be the best. If she wasn't...  
  
Seeing red, Asuka swung.  
  
Rei did not flinch or try to defend herself in the slightest. She simply stood there and watched Asuka with all the detachment of someone observing these events through a monitor. It was with a cool and unemotional eye that she watched her comrade's knuckles snap up through the air, and she did not so much as cry out when that compact, deceptively powerful fist drove itself into the side of her face, striking her on the jaw and forcing her head to swing away to one side.  
  
Asuka glared and panted, her bosom heaving.  
  
Rei slowly turned to look at Asuka once more, still as unemotional, still as detached, still as robotically inhuman. She blinked twice, slowly. Her cheek was red, but she did not show any sign of pain or distress. Her eyes were still perfectly blank, and she did not so much as even rub the spot where she'd been hit.  
  
Asuka glared daggers, fuming indignantly. She did not feel in the least relieved by this exertion, this impulsive action. Usually it was cathartic to hit someone, usually it helped to get the anger out of her system, to cool her mood with the pleasure of schadenfreude when she saw her target's pain. But she got nothing from Rei. It was almost like kicking a wall. Not in the sense of solidity, of course, though Rei had to be very sturdy indeed if one of Asuka's punches couldn't even faze her.  
  
There was a moment's silence. Then—  
  
"That hurt," Rei said presently, looking at Asuka with her usual inscrutable expression, saying this while doing nothing else to express any awareness of pain or the slightest bodily harm.  
  
"Good," said Asuka, looking and sounding disgruntled. "If you aren't even going to fight back, then at least I know you'll  _feel_  it."  
  
She brought up her other fist, and this she drove into Rei's gut. The Japanese pilot reacted little more to this than to the sock on the jaw, not even though the blow should have doubled her over in pain. It was honestly impressive, in a morbid sort of way, that Rei could keep standing erect with her face almost perfectly blank, showing nothing of the pain she HAD to be feeling.  
  
"Fight... back?" Rei said slowly, perplexedly, a slight labor of breathing the only immediate sign that she felt any effects from Asuka's attack.  
  
"It's not as satisfying if I can't prove I'm better," said Asuka haughtily, managing to sound imperious despite her boiling anger. Everything about this girl just pissed her off. It wasn't healthy how mad Rei made her. It was a pathological, borderline psychotic rage, deeply rooted and irrational, and on some level Asuka knew this. "Beating a dead fish. That's what it's like."  
  
Rei seemed to process something more than was intended from Asuka's choice of words.  _Maguro_  was what she said, a Japanese word that, by itself, simply meant  _tuna_. But there were other connotations, and Rei knew vaguely that the word could also refer to a kind of sexual act or position. It was a similar sense to  _cold fish_ , where the woman was...  
  
Unresponsive. Motionless. Just lying there, taking it, and contributing nothing.  
  
Rei wondered if Asuka understood the suggestion behind her choice of words. At least in English, Rei knew that there was similar slang, and weren't German and English rather close relatives, linguistically? The bluenette cocked her head and looked at Asuka.  
  
Again she surveyed the other girl's frame, and she found herself pleasantly surprised to notice an erectness in Asuka's nipples, a slight moistness glistening about her labia.  
  
Yes. Perhaps Asuka knew  _exactly_  what her choice of words suggested.  
  
"You want me to fight back, then?" Rei said.  
  
"I'd feel bad if I was just beating up some defenseless bimbo," was Asuka's gruff reply.  
  
Rei noted that Asuka had not made any further moves to strike her, despite the obvious tension and aggression in her frame. She wondered absently why Asuka did not attack again. She clearly WANTED to, after all.  
  
But then she figuratively shrugged this off and curled her own hands into fists, adopting the loose and deceptively civilian stance she'd been instructed to use in cases of self defense. NERV walked a thin line between making their pilots seem capable and yet not too far beyond the ability of an average person, likely so that future pilot candidates would not be discouraged by any perceived genius or hypercompetence in the present crop.  
  
This was easier for some of them to accomplish than for others.  
  
Asuka grinned in vicious satisfaction, perceiving a change in the atmosphere, noting the subtle shifting of Rei's frame. She nearly snarled in pleasure, spreading her legs and slightly bowing her torso so as to lower her center of gravity and stabilize herself in anticipation of any retaliatory strikes. In a real fight, getting knocked to the ground was the end—unless you were able to pull your opponent down with you when you fell, getting knocked off your feet meant certain defeat.  
  
In a real fight, people weren't chivalrous. People didn't stand there and wait for the opponent to get back up. That was a conceit of formalized martial arts, of ceremonial dueling and bullshit  _honor_  contrived to make the thugs who ruled or enforced the rule seem respectable and decent and admirable. When you were fighting to the death, you couldn't afford hesitation. You had to press every advantage. You had to be a mean, dirty, ruthless son of a bitch. That was how you won fights.  
  
Rei's attack was so sudden that Asuka didn't have time to react.  
  
One moment the girl was standing there, clearly ready but not making any move, still cool as a cucumber with fat tits swaying and bubble butt thrust out. Then, as if a switch was flipped, there was a streak of flesh color across Asuka's field of vision an instant before her eyes exploded in blackness and stars, and she was forced to reel back, to stagger away and raise a hand to her face and vehemently swear.  
  
" _Sohn einer Hündin!_ " she cursed, rubbing her nose and blinking rapidly. Sight returned to her after a moment, just soon enough for her to catch another streak of pale-skin hue.  
  
Raising an arm like a flag pole, Asuka was able to catch the coming blow at cross purposes, knocking Rei's fist off target. Then she snapped down and seized this arm in a wrestling hold, the pride of Western martial arts. She looked into Rei's eyes, almost expecting to see some glint of demoniac ferocity to match the sudden speed and fury of the girl's strikes.  
  
But her opponent's eyes were as cold as ever, blank and shuttered against the betrayal of emotion, if any emotion at all lurked behind them. It sent a slight shiver down Asuka's spine.  
  
Then Rei kicked upward, taking advantage of their closeness to drive a knee into the underside of Asuka's chest. The redhead's ample breasts flew upward from the blow, stinging with pain, and Asuka let go of Rei in surprise and anger. The German's eyes flashed, all the more furious that she had been forced to release her foe, and again she struck with a powerful haymaker.  
  
It was a wild attack, seemingly coarse and vulgar in comparison to Rei's fluid, disciplined movements, but damned if it wasn't effective. Her fist drove under the bluenette's arms and caught her in the side of the chest, sending her whiter tits swinging to the side, Asuka's knuckles burying themselves to the point of nearly vanishing in their doughy expanse ere the breasts finally succumbed to imparted momentum.  
  
A rude and ridiculous move by all accounts, targeting her opponent's tits, especially when those hills of flesh were so great and soft. Punching Rei in the chest might cause her pain, however she was too cushioned by far for any but the fiercest blows thereupon to do real material damage. But fair was fair. Asuka was very proud of her own bosom, and possessed of a somewhat vindictive nature.  
  
"Do you like that, you bitch?!" she demanded, speaking rather more sharply than necessary. Her bosom heaved noticeably, great mountains of womanflesh red with a vibrant flush, rising and falling ponderously.  
  
Rei cocked her head, her own breasts coming rather soon to a rest, thanks to the considerable powers of inertia granted by their exceptional mass.  
  
"A little," she answered lightly.  
  
Something about her tone galled Asuka even more than the knee to her tits.  
  
" _Fotze,_ " she hissed, and lunging forward she aimed another punch for Rei's chest.  
  
The bluenette did not try to block, but instead used Asuka's reckless advance as an opportunity to strike in turn. Both of their defenses were lowered, and they committed the better parts of their strength to an all-out offensive blow. Asuka's fist vanished for several seconds into the pillowy depths of Rei's bosom, her hand swallowed up by a criminally soft and pliable teat. Rei struck Asuka on the nipple and ground her knuckles against the stiff, tender nub, causing the redhead to squeal in a confused mix of sensations.  
  
Asuka was more reckless than Rei, more vulnerable to such devastating retaliations, but she was also more solidly built—their curves notwithstanding—and possessed of a headstrong temperament, not easily daunted by pain. Rei was colder, more logical and detached, slighter in bone and sinew than Asuka, more vulnerable to physical harm between the two of them, but also more disciplined and pragmatic, more willing to put herself in harm's way.  
  
Rei was the more likely to back down, but ill equipped in her emotional disconnect to reconcile with the volatile, bloody-minded Asuka. Asuka was, in her temperament more likely to exhaust her anger and stalk off, to cut deep with a final Parthian shot, but she was too obstinate by far to accept either a loss or a draw. It was a bad match up, all around. Neither of them could really relate to or understand the other—they were simply too different in background, mood, and values. All they could do was fight.  
  
Both girls staggered back, panting and grasping at their bosoms. Asuka tenderly caressed her ill used nipple, while Rei curiously fondled the knot of pain in her breast. Both were rather ruddier in face than before, and Asuka in particular was looking a mix of vexed, pleased, and furious.  
  
"Do you enjoy hurting me?" asked Rei softly, looking down to between Asuka's legs. She saw a fair bit of moisture seeping from the German's unshaven,  _au naturel_  sex. "Or is it being hurt that arouses you?"  
  
Asuka flushed and squeezed her thighs together, putting a hand over her cunt to block it from Rei's coolly searching gaze.  
  
"Don't try to play Freud with me, sex doll. I come from the birthplace of modern psychology. But what about you?" she said sharply, glowering at Rei's equally, unabashedly wet pussy. "What part of this is getting  _you_  off?"  
  
Rei shrugged.  
  
"It is surprisingly enjoyable as a whole," she commented, "although of some parts I could have told you beforehand. You have a very handsome body, and my own body seems to appreciate prolonged observation and repeated contact. Seeing you hurt increases my enjoyment, also, as does getting hurt by you."  
  
Asuka narrowed her eyes.  
  
"So you're a lesbian S&M freak on top of everything else?" she said. "Hmph.  _Du bist 'ne Schlampe._ "  
  
"Indeed, that would seem to be the case," said Rei mildly. " _Ich will ficken_.  _Ich will fechten._  I don't care which we do, particularly."  
  
This statement caused Asuka to blush fiercely.  
  
" _Leck mich am Arschloch,_ " she muttered, averting her eyes from Rei. "You bitch. You walking sex doll."  
  
Rei did something that might almost have been taken for a smile.  
  
"I think I would like that very much, Asuka. May I please do so, if it is not too great an inconvenience?"  
  
" _F-Fick dich!_ " Asuka spluttered, her face going redder by the moment. She raised her arms once more into a fighting pose.  
  
This time Rei really did smile, and that more than anything else was what finally threw Asuka off balance and caused the last vestiges of her fury to go cold. She stared at her fellow pilot with something between fear and a shameful, secret hope.  
  
"Please do," said Rei, throwing her arms apart. "Ravish me, or allow me to ravish you."  
  
Asuka clenched her fists and grit her teeth. Although she no longer felt angry...  
  
Coolly, refusing to let the bluenette set the pace, she walked forward and punched Rei between the legs, burying her fist into a shaven, virgin cunt. The girl cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure, the first really emotional vocalization that Asuka could ever recall hearing from her.  
  
No wonder. Rei might have had trouble with the complex, secondary, social conceits of emotional courtesy and expression, but sex was something primitive and visceral, the desire for it something that was set deeply into the brain. Sexual arousal was a purely physical, bodily sensation, or very nearly so, and even if one called Rei  _soulless,_  there could be no denying that she most certainly had a  _body_.  
  
And before Asuka could do anything else, Rei had swung her arms around the redhead, their position half grapple and half embrace. Rei's face resumed its emotionless default, and her movements became once more cold and mechanical even as they wrestled, but still there was a spark of warmth and hunger in her eyes. Their breasts mashed close together. Their arms intertwined, and their hands fiercely roamed each other's bodies. It might have been a passionate embrace or a furious combat. One could hardly say which, for certain.  
  
Hell, perhaps it was  _both at once_. Asuka's moans, at least, were certainly a bit too enthusiastic, even if she also interspersed them with feral growls and snarls.  
  
They were, whatever the case, a couple of seriously fucked up bitches.  
  
Ritsuko Amagi watched the locker room security footage with a mix of interest and exasperation. Her assistant Maya stood behind her with wide eyes and a distinct nosebleed.  
  
"Wow... I didn't think people could bend that way," said the latter, obviously enraptured.  
  
"It's not that hard," said Ritsuko with a dismissive shrug. "I do wish they'd hurry it up, though."  
  
Meanwhile, down in the simulation chamber, an oblivious Shinji stood in his plugsuit, wondering what on earth was taking his fellow pilots so long.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I had to use online resources for the German, especially Asuka's swearing and insults, so if the usage, conjugation, or overall grammar is off... *shrug* But this fic was another "requested" one shot, and I had some fun with it. 
> 
> Updated: 9-14-16
> 
> TTFN and R&R!
> 
> – — ❤


End file.
